I have been asking my son for the last month what he wants Santa to bring him for Christmas. After many discussions and a huge list I had to tell him Santa only takes list of 5 items or less and that he would have to figure out what he really wanted.
It got me thinking about what my letter for Security Santa would look like and here is what I came up with:
Dear Security Santa,
I hope everything is well at the North Pole and your big brother has stopped cyber-bullying you about wanting to be in security and not follow in the family business. Did you remind him that he one time let an Elf become a dentist?!?!
Anywho I have been a very (mostly) good boy this year. Much, much better than my friends at the NSA have been! So hopefully you can see it in your heart to give me these five things:
Painless Patching Kit
It is 2013 right? Keeping a Windows machine up-to-date shouldn’t take a network administrator. If you somehow could take the idea of Secnuia PSI and make it a workable solution you would be my hero! Think of the number of problems you could solve if Flash, Java and Reader automatically updated themselves correctly!
Security Conference Cloud.
I go to my fair share of conferences a year but I never see all the talks I want to see. You need to invent a company that travels around and records all the security talks and hosts them behind a pay wall. I would pay $100 a year for a membership and I know there are a lot of other good Security professionals who can’t go anywhere that would also.
Less Basements and More Boardrooms.
I have some incredibly intelligent friends who I would love to see break out of their IT Crowd thinking and move out of the basement and into real security leadership roles in their companies. Help them understand talking to people who wear a suit everyday isn’t that hard!
WorldIT Department Peace
I ask for this every year but I still talk to a lot of security professionals who see their role as chief adversary officer in their IT department. Think about how much further we could move security if everyone actually tried to work with the developers and the system admins in their companies!
I really want a puppy and I have asked the real Santa for one for the past couple of years but I think him and my wife are in cahoots to stop it from it happening. So I figured I would go all shadow IT on them and ask you!
As you can see I don’t think I am asking for much this year so if you could please bring me all this stuff (mostly the puppy) that would ROCK!